Kate Motaung

About Kate Motaung

Kate Motaung is the Senior Writer, Editor, and Content Manager for a multi-state company. She is the author of several books including Letters to Grief, 101 Prayers for Comfort in Difficult Times, and A Place to Land: A Story of Longing and Belonging. Kate is also the host of Five Minute Friday, an online writing community that equips and encourages Christian writers, and the owner of Refine Services, a company that offers editing services. She and her South African husband have three young adult children and currently live in West Michigan. Find Kate’s books at katemotaung.com/books.

The Landscape of Loss: Navigating Grief and Transition

, 2024-11-13T11:14:06+00:00May 6th, 2024|Featured, Grief Counseling, Individual Counseling|

The experience of loss forever shifts the landscape of our lives. Without question, grief changes things. Sometimes, it changes everything, including us. It is important to embrace the reality that the life we once knew before death or loss simply won’t be the same. But what we identify as a single major change in life impacts many areas that have compound effects, in the seen and unseen, in what is felt as well as the imperceptible.Death as disruptionThe rhythms we became accustomed to, even those that may have irritated us from time to time, were predictable, familiar, and known to us. When disrupted, the change and transitions associated with adjustment can make us feel unsafe, as if our entire world is crumbling. Death is part of the life cycle, and we simply want to buffer ourselves from the sting and sharp edges of loss.Even in this, we must allow ourselves to feel what we’re feeling to process what we’d rather escape. Though it may be excruciatingly painful, beauty can emerge from death’s ashes.The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me, because the LORD has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners...and provide for those who grieve in Zion –  to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor. – Isaiah 61:1,3, NIVThe evidence of Jesus’ resurrection provides the best evidence. What seems negative and forever lost in death can produce newness and life. Although Christ makes all [...]

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How and Why Help for Depression Is Needed

, 2024-11-13T11:14:20+00:00April 2nd, 2024|Depression, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Did you know that about 10-15% of the population will suffer from depression during their lifetime? It is a common illness that affects an enormous number of people worldwide. Although depression is seen more often in women and elderly people, men are affected by it as well, but help for depression is available. There are several different treatments for depression and receiving help is often successful in most people who suffer from it. It can be a relief to realize this, as the symptoms of depression can have an incapacitating effect on all who suffer from it and significantly affect those who care for them. In this article, you will find more about what causes depression, and how to treat it, so that you or anyone experiencing it and their friends and family can better understand the illness. By arming yourself with knowledge, you will be able to maximize the benefits that treatment offers. Understanding depression better Depression is an illness. Like other illnesses, it can significantly impact every aspect of someone’s life. This includes their enjoyment of hobbies and fun activities, their ability to perform well at work, and their relationships. One significant feature of depression is that no two people display it in the same manner, which can make it difficult to diagnose. While a well-known feature is that one suffers from a low mood and is generally more pessimistic with a loss of interest in activities they previously thought of as fun, there are many other common symptoms. Some of these are: Weight changes. Headaches, backaches, and other physical symptoms. Reduced appetite. Feeling irritable. Feeling guilty and helpless. Feeling anxious. Finding it difficult to get up in the morning. Always feeling tired or lacking energy. Trouble with sleeping, this can be falling asleep when going to [...]

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8 Simple Ways to Feel Better

, 2024-11-13T11:15:09+00:00March 6th, 2024|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development|

Have you ever felt like all the things in life are heavy, as if you are weighed down by the responsibilities, problems, and worries you face? This is not how God wants you to live! He wants you to live freely and lightly in His grace. Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. – Matthew 11:28-30, NIV But knowing this and living it out are two very different things. Understanding how to come to God and accept His rest can be hard. When faced with challenging issues in our life, we often do not even know where to start. How do I lay my burdens down in order to feel better? The best way to learn is to start simply by incorporating small changes into your life that are not overwhelming. As you do that, you gradually shift your thinking and actions, which leads to feeling better. It does not mean your problems will go away, but it does mean you can feel better as you handle them. There are no magic solutions or quick fixes to make everything in your life different or to make you feel better. However, making small steps and being diligent to follow them can bring some hope, as you trust God to bring change. Begin by reading through the list of ideas and choosing one or two to implement. If you attempt the whole list, it can become overwhelming. Instead, as you master a few small changes, you can then build upon that momentum once you have incorporated them [...]

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How to Develop Good Communication Skills

, 2024-11-13T11:15:23+00:00February 27th, 2024|Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Relationship Issues|

The importance of good communication skills cannot be understated at a work presentation, a seminar, or in general conversation. Someone with good communication skills is a person who can pass on and receive information and ideas with clarity and understanding. There are different types of communication including verbal, written, non-verbal, and visual. Our ability to maneuver and use these types of communication styles will land us an advantage. As the world is changing, our ability to communicate effectively is a high priority. Why are good communication skills necessary? The ability to hear and be heard is integral to how we live our lives, whether professionally, socially, or academically. Below are some examples of why good communication skills are important. Conflict resolution. No human interaction is without its moments of conflict. The ability to listen, understand, state one’s facts clearly, and talk respectfully goes a long way in resolving conflict. During a heated moment, staying calm and watching one’s nonverbal cues can be important in communicating the need for an amicable resolution. Whether the resolution comes through compromise or collaboration, good communication skills aid in this respect. Career advancement. In professional settings, one needs to know how to communicate. No better time is this seen than in how one answers questions during an interview. Prospective employers need well-rounded employees who will work well with others, can lead when needed, and are good team players. All this is made possible by one’s ability to communicate well. Building and maintaining personal relationships. It has been said that the success of relationships sorely lies in the ability to communicate. Relationships don’t just include romantic partnerships either; they include any relationship with any person, whether it be at work, in the family, or friendship in general. Through effective communication, we get to know those [...]

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Bible Verses About Fear to Help You Stand Amidst Storms

, 2024-11-13T11:15:42+00:00February 21st, 2024|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling, Spiritual Development|

Everyone has fears, and no two people have the exact same fears. We react in interestingly unique ways to the things that cause us fear. Some people steer clear of their fears altogether, while others confront them head-on, by watching scary movies, going on roller coasters, jumping out of airplanes, or reading Bible verses about fear. Fear is a natural emotion that we all feel, and it can exist on a scale from mild all the way to debilitating. Depending on the types of fears you have and how severe they are, your fears might hold you back from performing daily tasks or advancing in important areas of your life. The Bible provides us with much wisdom regarding fear, and that wisdom can help us as we try to overcome our fears and live boldly in the freedom that only Jesus Christ can give us. What causes our fear? We have all felt fear at some point in our lives, and in most situations we are able to isolate the cause of our fears. In general, fear is a complex emotion that may not always have a single primary cause. Experiences such as trauma may become the source of future fears, while other fears arise due to the physical symptoms they cause. For instance, heights might make you feel dizzy and nauseous, which can lead to a fear of high places. In other situations, fear may represent fear of an entirely different experience altogether, such as a fear of losing control. In addition, fear can be triggered by many different things. For instance, it can be triggered by specific things or objects, such as dogs, spiders, snakes, flying, or high places. Or it can be triggered by specific situations, like meeting new people or being in public. Or it [...]

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In Pursuit of Spiritual Maturity: Tips for Growing Your Relationship with God

2024-10-30T09:03:53+00:00January 23rd, 2024|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Spiritual Development|

All living things must grow, but that growth looks different at different stages of life and in different areas of life. For example, while our physical growth reaches its peak in the first few decades of our lives, our emotional, mental, and spiritual growth can continue long after physical growth has all but stopped. Your spiritual maturity is one area of your life where you never quite peak – you simply grow from strength to strength if you’re applying yourself. Why pursue spiritual maturity? We were created by God and for God (Genesis 1: 26-31; Colossians 1: 15-23), and we find our deepest joy and meaning only in Him. Genesis 1 tells us that we were created in God’s image, but we no longer reflect God’s image as we were intended to because we chose to distrust God and have life on our own terms (Genesis 3). However, despite our distrust and disobedience, God intends to bless us (Genesis 12:1-3, 50:20), and that’s why He came into the world to rescue us and bless us (2 Corinthians 5: 17, 21; Titus 3: 3-7). All this is to say that despite rejecting Him, God seeks to save people and bless them, and He wants them to be mature in Jesus Christ and to have them look, act, think, live, and love more and more like Jesus did (Colossians 1: 27-28). It’s important to pursue spiritual maturity because that is what allows us to fulfill our highest purpose and pursue our deepest joy. If God made us for Himself, then knowing why and how to relate to God and do life on His terms is a goal worth pursuing with everything we’ve got. What is it all about? There can be some misconceptions about what spiritual maturity is. Having many or [...]

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The Total Package: Nurturing Your Spiritual, Mental, and Emotional Health

2024-10-30T09:04:03+00:00November 22nd, 2023|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Spiritual Development|

Jesus didn’t suffer an agonizing death of torturous cruelty so that we, His children, could wallow in pain, damaging our mental and emotional health. His sacrifice was intended to accomplish salvation for all of God’s people, with all of its accompanying benefits in this life as well. Though the Father’s aim in sending the Son was to reconcile fallen humanity to Himself by giving them new life, He intends for that new life to transform our human experience. Our salvation is also designed to testify to God’s goodness. Christ came to bring to us abundant life, so His sons and daughters would be living displays of His glory to the surrounding world. Beloved, I pray that all may go well with you and that you may be in good health, as it goes well with your soul. – 3 John 2, ESV That is not a denial of the joys of spending eternity with the One who loved us first. The idea of living eternally in Heaven is something for the believer to anticipate with joy. Having a redeemed soul is a critical part of experiencing abundant life in this world, even where our mental and emotional health is concerned. We assert that because of Jesus’ blood the Father forgives our sins and cleanses us from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9; Romans 10:9-10). However, healing our hearts (though never perfectly this side of heaven) is one of salvation’s effects in this world. When we consider this, it can reassure us that Jesus is concerned with the totality of our well-being. Believers tend to emphasize spiritual wellness as we nurture and celebrate our faith, and it is truly only because of that spiritual wellness that any sort of mental health can come about. God is our Father who intends for [...]

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Coming Out of the Quicksand: Recovering From Infidelity

2024-10-30T09:04:09+00:00August 28th, 2023|Couples Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Infidelity and Affairs, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Infidelity is like a quicksand trap. The draw of an illicit encounter retains an alluring appearance on the surface. By the time we are engaged in it, however, it magnetizes and pulls us under. Its influence restricts us and makes it difficult to get free without drawing attention. We may not want to do it, but reaching out for help can extricate us from the clutches of what would consume and devour. Satan would try to seal our mouths with the sting of shame instead of asking for an escape and the strength to turn back to the Lord. Yet, we don’t have to silence ourselves, but instead freely embrace the Helper in the Person of the Holy Spirit and those who will help to restore us (1 Corinthians 10:13; Galatians 6:1-2). It is possible to exit an adulterous affair but linger in shame. When we look at ourselves in the mirror, we may no longer see someone we respect or even view ourselves as someone that the Lord loves. The same enemy whose enticement we once followed now taunts us with condemnation and shame (James 1:14). Although we cannot reverse the choices that led to our part in the infidelity or undo the past, we can trust the eternal God to heal what time cannot. Beginning today with true repentance turns our hearts back to the Father and what He says about us. This is what penetrates the wounds we can’t reach and what infidelity couldn’t answer (1 John 1:9). Recovering from infidelity doesn’t have to be done in isolation. We require the support of sisters and brothers in Christ to facilitate restoration. Ultimately, it is the work of the Holy Spirit within but Jesus moves through His Body to bring wholeness in ways that are impossible in [...]

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You Are Not Alone: Common Women’s Insecurities

2024-10-30T09:04:18+00:00August 17th, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling, Women’s Issues|

There is likely nothing that adds to a burden more than the feeling that you’re carrying it alone. Sometimes, the best thing you can hear is “Me too!”. The fact that another person shares the same burden, that you aren’t alone, or weird, in dealing with certain things, doesn’t eliminate your struggle, but it certainly lightens the load. Women’s insecurities are no different. C.S. Lewis once wrote, “When two or more of the companions discover that they have in common some insight or interest or even taste which the others do not share and which, till that moment, each believed to be his unique treasure (or burden). The typical expression of opening Friendship would be something like, ‘What? You too? I thought I was the only one.’ It is when two such persons discover one another, when, whether with immense difficulties and semi-articulate fumblings or with what would seem to us amazing and elliptical speed, they share their vision - it is then that Friendship is born. And instantly they stand together in an immense solitude.” Knowing that other women have insecurities like yours may not forge a friendship, but it allows you to stand in “immense solitude” with others. Common women’s insecurities All people have insecurities, and they stem from a variety of sources. Some insecurities may not be peculiar to women, but many women experience them. Airing them out allows the sense of shame, guilt, or fear that shrouds them to dissipate. Some of the more common women’s insecurities include the following: Insecurities about one’s body. There is a lot of pressure in society to conform to certain beauty standards. Ads, movies, and social media all conspire to create the image of the perfect woman. A negative body image can result, leading to dissatisfaction with the body [...]

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Key Questions to Ask in Premarital Counseling

2024-10-30T09:04:28+00:00June 28th, 2023|Couples Counseling, Featured, Premarital Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Listen to this article The American family is changing rapidly, and now more than ever shifts are occurring which means, for example, that many are choosing to live without a romantic partner. According to 2019 census data, around 38% of American adults from ages 25-54 were “unpartnered,” meaning they were neither living with a partner nor were they married. While all that is happening, people are nonetheless choosing to be married despite these broader societal trends, and it’s important for those taking that step to be prepared for marriage. Premarital counseling is a key component in the marriage preparation process. Do we need premarital counseling? Getting ready to be married is a busy and overwhelming time. Not only are weddings expensive, but the social strain they can cause is daunting. The couple can find themselves having more arguments over napkins, seating charts, and color schemes than they may have had in their entire dating life together. It may seem like adding one more thing to the to-do list is courting trouble. Despite it seeming like an optional extra, premarital counseling is something that every couple will benefit from. A wedding is an event that takes months to plan, but it’s over in a matter of hours. The wedding is a single day, but you have the rest of your lives to prepare for. Premarital counseling is the essential preparation that gets a couple on the same page about important aspects of their life together. It helps a couple enter their lifelong union equipped to nurture their relationship and handle the challenges that will inevitably arise. Important questions premarital counseling. Premarital counseling can happen through a spiritual leader like a pastor, and it can happen through a professional counselor. Whether online or in person, as a couple, [...]

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