Kate Motaung

Our lives have seasons, complex moments that aren’t always easy to unravel, but that may have a dominant theme. We all experience grief in its various shades, whether through bereavement and loss of a loved one, the irretrievable breakdown of significant relationships, or a long-cherished dream that doesn’t come true. Grief deeply impacts our hearts, leaving us sorrowful in the wake of the loss. The Teacher in Ecclesiastes says that, There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance – Ecclesiastes 3:1-4, NIV While grief can be debilitating, it’s part of the process of making sense of the loss encountered and learning how to live with that loss. As you walk the path of grief, you can seek out support in the form of a professional, like a grief therapist in Texas. You don’t have to walk alone in your time of crisis. Grief and Us Grief is an experience we all must reckon with at one point or another in our lives. When you experience loss, the healthy way to respond is to deal with the myriad thoughts and emotions that come up. Each person has their own way of facing the difficult emotions that loss brings. The important task is to face the pain, confusion, sadness, anger, relief, regrets, joys, and other emotions and thoughts that accompany the loss. Just as each person’s journey with grief is unique due to each person’s unique relationship with [...]

When his wife Joy died in 1960, C.S. Lewis wrote a meditative reflection on his grief. He explored, quite candidly, his doubts, anger, and bewilderment at losing his wife to cancer only three years after they married. When the collection of reflections was first published, Lewis did so under a pseudonym, N.W. Clerk, perhaps because of how deeply personal the work was, and the way he was wrestling with his faith in God. Grief is in many ways a deeply personal thing; it’s your relationship with the loved one you’re mourning, and the connection you had with them is something only you understand fully. The title of Lewis’s book is A Grief Observed; it speaks of Lewis’s journey as he remembered his wife and tried to understand the meaning of her loss. But his experiences don’t necessarily stand as a representation of what all grief looks like. While grief is already hard because it is isolating, when that loss isn’t recognized for one reason or another, it becomes even more challenging, and your mourning is dismissed. When grief is denied, it can have many negative consequences for the individual. However, it’s possible to still grieve and work through loss even when it’s not recognized by others. Examples of Disenfranchised Grief Disenfranchised grief is grief that isn’t approved of or recognized by your family, community, or society. We, meaning our culture and communities, assign value to things. Our belief systems, cognitive frameworks, and worldviews shape our values and taboos. They shape what is considered important, as well as what is considered desirable and worthy of pursuit. This applies to what ‘counts’ as a loss. Disenfranchised grief occurs when you feel you’ve experienced a loss, but the people around you don’t consider it a true loss, worthy of grief. As a [...]