Why Are Female Friendships Important to Women?

Female friendships are foundationally important for women. At our core, we are created for relationships. Ideally, these relationships will be life-giving and offer us not just companionship, but growth opportunities and support. The Bible encourages relationships because God invented the idea, and He gave His life so that He could restore relationship with us.

The Bible explicitly tells us that we should surround ourselves with people who can challenge us to live closer to the Lord and be the best versions of ourselves we can be. We are to be in relationships that sharpen us, just as iron sharpens iron (Proverbs 27:17).

Why is it important to have female relationships?

Female friendships can be an important part of this sharpening. They can also bring emotional comfort, lots of coffee, and laughter. They’re an important part of womanhood because of the unique ways that women relate to each other.

While these sharpening friendships aren’t exclusively reserved for platonic, same-sex friendships, there are some compelling reasons why female friendships can fulfill this directive and can deeply enrich your life.

Women are emotionally intelligent

Female friendships are often deeply personal because most women are naturally inclined toward emotional awareness and deep connections. Women tend to have a high Emotional Quotient, or EQ. That means that they are skilled at recognizing emotions, both in themselves and in others. They also excel in responding with empathy because of this deep ability to feel.

Because of this, female friendships can grow deep emotional bonds. Conversations often go beyond surface-level topics and move into meaningful discussions about deep-seated fears, hopes, and relationships. This bond can happen relatively quickly.

Women are empathetic

Everyone can learn to be empathetic, but women tend to excel in this area naturally. These female-to-female friendships often mimic what the Scripture tells us to do for each other as fellow Christ followers: “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way, you will fulfill the law of Christ.” (Galatians 6:2, NIV)

Emotionally aware friendships make that kind of support not only possible, but natural. Women tend to think about, try to solve, and empathize with each other’s problems. They’re naturally wired and culturally conditioned to carry each other’s troubles just as Scripture outlines.

Women share similar life experiences

If you want to grow in wisdom and grace, it’s important to “walk with the wise” (Proverbs 13:20, NIV) as Scripture says. That means that you should surround yourself with people who not only have your best interest at heart, but who have also been through similar experiences.

You can gain a lot of wisdom about how to handle your toddler’s tantrums from another mother. You can learn what to expect out of perimenopause from a woman who has already gone through it. And you can learn how to trust God for a miracle, even when the physical evidence is stacked against you, from someone who has trusted God for a miracle in her own life.

Biblical Examples of Female Friendships

The Bible shows us how female friendships are beneficial. One of the most powerful examples of female friendship in Scripture is the relationship between Ruth and Naomi. After the loss of their husbands, Ruth makes the remarkable choice to stay with Naomi rather than return to her own people, declaring, “Where you go I will go, and where you stay, I will stay (Ruth 1:16, NIV).

Their bond was created through sacrifice and unwavering commitment, even through deep grief and incredible uncertainty. Ruth’s devotion not only sustained Naomi emotionally but ultimately became an example of faithful friendships that we can aspire to.

Another beautiful picture of female friendship is in Mary and Elizabeth. When Mary receives the overwhelming news that she will carry the Messiah, she goes to Elizabeth, who responds with immediate affirmation and joy (Luke 1:39-45). Instead of doubting or comparing herself to Mary, Elizabeth offered encouragement and spoke truth to Mary.

These are wonderful examples of friendships that celebrate God’s work in another’s life and offer support in hard times. These are relationship goals you can strive toward in your own life.

What Healthy Female Friendships Look Like

The Bible offers us some beautiful examples of female friendships that are still relevant today. So how do you know you’re in a healthy female friendship?

They’re good listeners

One of the greatest gifts a friend can offer is a listening ear, and women tend to excel in this area. In female friendships, there is often an unspoken understanding that sometimes you don’t need advice; you simply need to be heard. Women usually offer attentive, listening ears that allow their friends to process their thoughts and to speak without interruption or judgment.

Proverbs 20 tells us that “the purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out.” (Proverbs 20:5, NIV) A good female friend does exactly that. She draws out what is buried deep within you and helps you to understand yourself better.

They celebrate you

Genuine female friendship has a spirit of celebration. A true friend rejoices when you get the promotion, cheers you on when you step out in faith, and claps the loudest when God answers your prayers.

Romans calls us to “rejoice with those who rejoice” (Romans 12:5, NIV), and women in authentic friendships do this beautifully. Rather than being threatened by each other’s success, godly female friends understand that one woman’s victory is a testimony for them all and not something to compete with.

They hold you accountable

True friendship isn’t always comfortable, but it’s always honest. A godly female friend loves you too much to stay silent when she sees you heading in the wrong direction. A friend might gently tell you that the man you’re dating is not treating you the way God intends. It might show up as someone who loves you enough to point out that you’ve been isolating yourself and encourages you to seek help.

They pray for you

There’s something uniquely wonderful about a woman who will stop what she’s doing to pray for you. When you have someone in your life who will bring your name before God, who prays over your marriage, your children, and your fears and dreams, you have found a true friend.

These relationships let you know that you are never truly alone in your struggles because they will sacrifice their own time to entreat God on your behalf. Because of a woman’s natural tendency toward empathy, women of faith tend to pray over the people they hold dear.

When You Don’t Have That Kind of Friendship

Unfortunately, not every woman has a close relationship with other females. Reading about deep connection and loyalty may seem foreign to you or might even make you long for that type of authentic friendship. If that’s where you find yourself, know that you’re not alone in your loneliness.

There are many reasons why you might not have meaningful female friendships in your life, and the truth is, it’s probably not you. Maybe you’re dealing with past hurt or betrayal. Maybe you’re simply going through a life transition, relocation, or a busy schedule. Sometimes you have the desire for a deep friendship, but the opportunity or circumstances haven’t allowed you to make those desired connections.

Counseling can help you by offering a consistent place to experience all the benefits of a female friendship and more. With your counselor, you can discuss your emotions with openness, much like you would with a trusted friend. One of the additional benefits of therapy is that you don’t have the pressure to reciprocate or navigate the complexities that friendships often bring.

Therapy can also help you learn how to make lasting female friendships by teaching you good communication, conflict resolution, and other interpersonal skills. This can help you grow as a person of faith and learn how to build the friendships you long for.

If you are struggling to find meaningful female friendships, call our team to set up an appointment with one of our trusted counselors and start building those important relationships in your life.